Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Had an encounter tonight that completely caught me off guard. This has happened before but usually only when I was is a "mental facility". Talking to a well dressed man in his late 60's, clear blue eyes. Discussing his love of music then WHAM, I realized he suffered from schizophrenia when out of the blue he told me about human trafficking by our local courts, stolen identities and the the government dissolving on Sept. 11th to bring about some sort of Reformation league of justice. I looked into his eyes and wondered how to did manage to exist with this illness to get to his age. Very well dressed and his eyes were so crystal blue, so clear. I have monsters that occasionally appear a mess with me but I go long breaks from it now. It made me grateful to the core that my mood disorder is very treatable and I don't find myself on street corners preaching a message that an illness whispers into my head. His wife died three years a go and how she must have loved him to deal with his illness for decades. No one in the theater enjoyed the music tonight as much as he did. I took the scrap of paper on which he had written 2 web addresses for me to go to and join up for the new legion of America and slid it in my pocket and thanked him for speaking with me. I'm grateful for the meeting and grateful that for today , all my illnesses are manageable and that the universe is terriblely kind and forgiving. My hope for him is there is not a part of him left that knows the rest of him is missing. If I go crazy again I hope i don't know it, complete decent in to madness is preferable than being keenly aware that you are completely out step with sanity. I was going to say reality, but reality is just perception, I guess sanity is too. Go figure.

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