Friday, September 18, 2009

Sometimes I wonder what is fixable and what isn't

On a long drive home tonight I was thinking about how there isn't much if anything I am attached to. I don't have one single thing that if taken away would bother me for long. Years ago I figured out that in order to value anything you have to first have self value.

I also don't think I've ever had anything possession wise that I felt I couldn't or would rather not do without. At one time my tv would have been one thing but I'm not attached to any programs like I used to be.

I'm sure once I thought it was a way of not getting hurt or not being vulnerable. A friend of mine was mortified a few years ago when my dog just "up and died" and I didn't grieve the way he thought I should. I've lost a lot of crap, pawned a lot of crap I never went back for and had many acquaintances that left over night and never missed them for more than a fleeting moment.

I just wonder if people who hoard know something I don't?

I want the full human experience and I wonder am I missing something and if so is it fixable.