Tuesday, April 12, 2011

I woke up me.

I got to watch someone last night completely tweaked and not only did in NOT look fun it was like watching the twitches, the final twitches of the dying. Using the tools of wellness, I allowed myself to notice it but not take it on personally. I slept really well and woke up completely in the zone. It's always a treat when I don't have to do my morning routine to remember who I am, to wake up as myself is great. This could be the best day of my life. It has all the makings to be fantastic and beyond the scope of what my addict mind could dream up for myself. To me , that is the essence of my recovery. When I do the basics I align myself up with what the flow of all that is life in the universe, verses what I feel compelled to scratch out and settle for on my own. I'm not alone, I am just as much a part of the universe as the moon is and the same power that can pull a plant out of a tiny seed can pull a life out of me. Not only can that magic pull happen, it's happening. I have undeniable proof all around me and it all starts with abstinence and surrender. After that, my progress is entirely dependent on my level of willingness and action. Some days it just comes easier and I'm going to enjoy this one and it may just mean that today is my day to be the strong one for the people I love and provide the stability and support for someone else who DIDN'T wake up themselves this morning.

2 comments:

Katie said...

I just have to remember not to panic when I don't have such a good day. Ebb and flow, ebb and flow. :)

Clinton Gandy said...

Yes, thank you. I do that , I forget it's all just moment in time. Yesterday I was having trouble getting a hold of that idea.