watching other people and what they do or don't do really helps me stay focused on my recovery. Simply removing the alcohol or drugs won't do for me what I need done. Removal of those two things will definitely keep you from getting into more trouble, it won't address the problem of living with a modicum of peace about myself.
I really want a life for myself that i haven't ever even dreamed of. That life and that peace all begin with getting to a meeting, becoming teachable and willing. The meeting is like the freeway entrance, I have to go through there to get anywhere.
If nothing changes, nothing changes. What am I actually willing to do differently, what thinking am I willing to relearn, how much fear can i walk through in order to let people know me. Today I want this more than I want to settle for what I had.
I went to a noon meeting and me and another guy were the only two who showed up. I sat on the stoop with him and talked with him and was willing to call it a meeting when another member showed up who called someone with a key.
It ended up being 5 of us and it was an intimate , honest meeting. Even when silence fell it was a soft silence that filled my recovery tank. It was a great meeting and I left feeling connected to recovery and people in my core.