Unless you are a highly enlightened human, it is very hard not to assume whatever it is that is going on in your life , bad or good isnt going to stick around. . Something inside me tries to convince me that whatever it is is going to last forever. If its heartache, then the human part of me is certain in will never end. If it's lovely and fun I just don't think about the good time stopping, but it does. My mother has a tendancy to tell me "YOU NEVER" and "YOU ALWAYS".........blah blah blah. Never and Always imply that something is constant and unending.
I was touchingly reminded this weekend that everything I know will end one day. It doesn't matter if something has been a certain way for 78 years or 78 minutes. The way of our world is constant change. Life, this thing that is fluttering strings of experiences strung together strictly by heartbeats moves closer to it's finality with every breath I take.
I watched a tiny box roll right past me over the weekend that contained a small remnant of a hammering hurricane of a woman that once embodied a will and a determination that defied the size of it's container, a category 5 or F5 tornado of will.. Part amusement and part consternation was experienced by everyone that knew her and loved her.. Honest to goodness as the shiny pretty box rolled by I thought to myself, "Our stories end" and it wasn't just a thought, it encompassed my whole gray headed being.
The point was hammered home to me, and more so than just a nebulous cautioning from a book that my time here , on this plane with these people all is subject to end without notices and BOOM!. Everything I know , everything I am familiar will is upended.
Instead of being a buzzard on my bed post , warning me of impending doom, I have noticed that presence of mind, awareness of the precarious state of being a temporary human just afforded me a clarity to feel more as it unfolds, to absorb everything about the present moment and savor it's flavor. To remember for myself and to gently remind others that "This too....shall pass". This isn't the place to sink roots into because our stories are told in forward motion so we must keep moving and not lose our momentum. This isn't the end of your story.
In my middle aged life I have seen so many things come and go. The Berlin Wall, the fall of Communism in Russia, Eastman Kodak the creator of modern photography fold it's company up. After 33 years of having a set of parents I have had a step mother for 16 years now, Blockbuster Video the BIGGEST video rental business there was for years is no more. Things end. So many endings.
Things end, seasons of productivity pass like the remnants of a summer garden in the deep winter. The trick for me is to absorb my life and all the bit players , enjoy it but not hold to tightly. One chapter will end and another will begin and one day the entire tale will be told. Our stories do and will end.
If you have a faith that has you preparing only for the afterlife, I ask you to stop and enjoy the life that God has given you here today. "Your' Soaking in It'. as a matter a fact. I love a country song by Trace Atkins
You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this
God, Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the different.
Just for today
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